nicotine and coffee are my friends in this fight and you you keep me warm all your cigarettes and coffee it keeps me warm

its no coincidence that about half of these pics are of people smoking. i love smoking and i just see myself as a smoker. i love the feel, the smell, the social aspect, the self destructive side of it, smoking even though my throat kills from smoking too much. for me giving up smoking was so hard coz i have such an addictive personality but im so proud of myself for having the self control to overcome it. i never knew i was so strong. i'll still socially smoke occasionally, especially when im drunk but i know i dont wanna get addicted again. it was scary how much control the addiction had over me and i never want to go back to that. but i still find when im looking through photography im always drawn to the pics of people smoking. i guess i find something beautiful in it.

all i could ever be to you is the darkness that we knew and this regret ive got accustomed to

Velvet November 2011 from WM Artist Management on Vimeo.

so im currently getting inspired by photography. i love pictures that take my breath away or remind me of good and bad times. im just collecting lots of beautiful photos but im not really saving the photographer names. i think its unimportant coz i just wanna share beautiful things x

when an ocean sits right between us there is no sign that we'll ever cross you should know that i feel the loss... i hurt too

 

(random pic, pic of arty, video of katie herzig, yasmins frank ocean cover)

im damaged goods for all to see now who would ever want to be with me?

im going through a pretty hard time at the moment. ive currently got exams and ive done fuck all studying. i find it so hard to study. i'll sit down to write an essay and it will literally take me hours. i find i get so distracted. i think the real problem is not the subjects im taking coz i do enjoy them its just coz i hate school, hate manchester and just wanna get the fuck away from everything and everyone.
im such an extrovert so school is hard coz i dont get on with the people there, so im spending all day every day with people who are coming from a different place than me. last year i tried to ignore that and just get on and be friendly but it didnt work. these people arent interested. so now i keep myself to myself but its hard to be so isolated. i have real friends but im not with them most of the time. i just think emotional and physically its so draining and when i get home i need an escape. i guess thats why ive turned to blogging again.
so ive already had 2 exams and they went okay but its so frustating coz i know i could do so much better if i could just concentrate. i just dont want to do this again in june and truly fuck my A levels up. after two years work i might as well get the results that im capable of. its so tempting to just say fuck it and leave but i know i need to get through this and its not worth leaving now. just 6 months to go. half a fucking year of misery. perfect. i just wanna escape (cue the picture)

my hands are cold my bodys numb im still in shock what have you done?

so i have 2 followers on bloglovin! 2 actual followers! ive just fallen in love with blogging again. im just adding more and more blogs to my bloglovin so i have a great newsfeed of amazing blogs. its so wierd people are actually reading what im writing! if you wanna know more about me then i guess you can check out my old blog here. but that was over a year ago that i finished it and ive changed alot since then. i cant really think of ways to describe myself so i guess keep following and youll find out.
a few things about my blog:

1. i always like to use lyrics as titles. they arent normally related to the post and im too lazy to write in every post who the lyrics are by but if you like a lyric then leave a comment and i'll get back to you who it is 
2. im not sure what this blog is mainly gonna be about but i love photography and none of it is mine. i'll normally give a link for you to check out more
3. thanks for any of you blog writers reading this who inspire me.
4. this blog is really still being made so excuse the bad layout etc. it will start looking better once i get more into the technical stuff